Famous Funny Dog Quotes

Here are some of the most famous funny dog quotes:

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue -Anonymous

Dogs are miracles with paws -Attributed to Susan Ariel Rainbow

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.  -Bern Williams

My little dog — a heartbeat at my feet.- Edith Wharton

The dog was created specially for children. He is the god of frolic.–Henry Ward Beecher

The greatest love is a mother’s; then a dog’s; then a sweetheart’s.–Polish Proverb

Scratch a dog and you will find a permanent job. — Franklin P. Jones

Properly trained, a man can be dog’s best friend. — Corey Ford
If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving your Fido only two of them.–Phil Pastoret

I talk to him when I’m lonesome like; and I’m sure he understands. When he looks at me so attentively, and gently licks my hands; then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes, but I never say naught thereat. For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes, but never a friend like that.– W. Dayton Wedgfarth

Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe. We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made.–Roger Caras

If you are a dog and your owner suggest that you wear a sweater. . .suggest that he wear a tail. -Fran Lebowitz

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive. — Gilda Radner

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.– Will Rogers

One reason a dog can be such a comfort when you’re feeling blue is that he doesn’t try to find out why.–Author Unknown

Man is a dog’s idea of what God should be.–Holbrook Jackson

Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. –Max Eastman

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.–Ogden Nash

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.–Andy Rooney

If your get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.–Will Rogers

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets made at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.–Steve Bluestone

They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.–Jerome Jerome

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.–Roger Caras

Near this spot are deposited the remains of one who possessed the Beauty without Vanity, Strength without Insolence, Courage without Ferocity, and the Virtues of Man without his Vices. This Praise, which would be unmeaning Flattery if inscribed over human ashes, is but a just tribute to the Memory of Boatswain, A Dog.”<b–Georg Gordon, Lord Byron, “Inscription on the Monument of a Newfoundland Dog.

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.–Christopher Morley

Whoever said you cannot buy happiness forgot about little puppies.–Gene Hill

I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven’t got the guts to bite people themselves.–Author Unknown

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.–Andy Rooney

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That’s almost $7.00 in dog money.–Joe Weinstein

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perserverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.–Robert Benchley

The best way to get a puppy is to beg for a baby brother — and they will settle for a puppy every time. –Winston Pendelton

You ask of my companions. Hills, sir, and the sundown, and a dog as large as myself that my father bought me. They are better than human beings, because they know but do not tell.–Emily Dickinson

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.– Woodrow Wilson

Dogs, the foremost snobs in creation, are quick to notice the difference between a well-clad and a disreputable stranger.–Albert Payson Terhune

To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring — it was peace.–Milan Kundera

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.–Josh Billings

I wonder what goes through his mind when he see us peeing in his water bowl.–Penny Ward Moser

The pug is living proof that God has a sense of humor.– Margo Kaufman

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.–Robert Benchley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.–Rita Rudner

Labradors are lousy watchdogs. They usually bark when there is a stranger about, but it is an expression of unmitigated joy at the chance to meet somebody new, not a warning.–Norman Strung

The nose of the bulldog has been slanted backwards so that he can breathe without letting go.– Winston Churchill

I like the bit of mongrel myself, whether it is a man or a dog; they’re the best for everyday.–George Bernard Shaw